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Something funny I found on facebook
Topic Started: Mar 16 2009, 08:56 PM (354 Views)
+ Megatron
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Dear Souvany,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but purple hedgehogs want to destroy you. I think I realized it when I finally changed my underwear at the Elton John concert and I saw you sit on my salt-beef bucket. I'm sure you're open enough to understand that we're related. I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep your glass eye as a memory. You should also know that I hate your cooking and you should get that embarrassing rash checked out.
Love always,
Nick

---------------------


Here's how you do it:
Dear (someone you recently talked to),
I don't really know how to tell you this, but (1). I think I realized it (2)(3) and I saw you (4) (5). I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning (8) to you, but I'll keep (9) as a memory. You should also know that I (10) and (11).
(12),
(Your name)



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That's basically it, more cheap entertainment for you.
Edited by Megatron, Mar 16 2009, 08:56 PM.
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My Team: (Pokémon [Level@Item])
:nebulion: [97@ :goldfeather: :male: ] :wallaro: [100@Expert Belt :male: HP: 364] :taloniteshiny: [100@ :orbsilver: :male: HP: 354]
:karozurshiny: [100@Choice Band :male: HP: 404] :felare: [11@Exp.Share :male: ] :tsunamic: [100@Expert Belt :male: HP: 354]


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MelonOfJustice
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THE Pokémon Professor

Dear TMM,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but you're a leprechaun. I think I realized it when I saw the purple monkey at the mental hospital and I saw you pull the clothes off the elephant in the corner. I'm sure you're frostbitten enough to understand that you need a sex-change. I'm returning our matching Snoopy underwear to you, but I'll keep Mc(whatever the F this is) as a memory. You should also know that I am better off without you and I will haunt you when I'm reincarnated as an eskimo.
Go milk a cow,
MoJ
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AliasBot
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NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition!

Dear Nobody,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but our romance is over. I think I realized it when we skinny-dipped in the bathtub at the mental hospital and I saw you carve your intials into the Catholic priest. I'm sure you're frostbitten enough to understand the middle-east is planning their revenge on you. I'm returning your Hannah Montana underwear to you, but I'll keep Mc as a memory. You should also know that I never will forget that night and I'm scratching my butt as you read this.
Greetings to your frog Leonard,
A.J.

The funny thing is, this can give some deeply personal(-ish) info to any people who know the format of this....and you hardly notice the fact when you're filling it out.

Notes: I haven't talked to anybody lately - I'm being strangely silent - and also, I think part of one of the answers of #9 is missing....'Mc' doesn't mean anything.
Edited by AliasBot, Mar 16 2009, 09:34 PM.
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+ Error
Code Master

Dear Malphis,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but You're a leprechaun. I think I realized it When your dog humped my leg In your apartment and I saw you Sit on my boyfriend. I'm sure you're Masochistic enough to understand That I get turned on only by garbage men. I'm returning Your love letters to me to you, but I'll keep Your photo with the moustache drawn on it as a memory. You should also know that I Always will remember the pep talks and Thanks for the Cocaine.
Greetings to your frog Leonard,
Error
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Warren and Crew


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+ Scizordoom
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SUBMARINES ARE FUN!

Dear Eden,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but I'm selling myself for candy. I think I realized it when we skinny dipped in the bathtub under a street light and I saw you sit on my boyfriend. I'm sure you're frostbitten enough to understand how awful you are. I'm returning your Hannah Montanna underwear to you, but I'll keep your glass eye as a memory. You should also know that I told my psychiatrist about the bruises and I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon.
Best of luck on the sex change,
Max

HAHAHAA LOL! I'm gonna show that to her too >.<
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IdlingSnow
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Atai~
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Dear Stan,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but you're a leprechaun. I think I realized it when I saw the purple monkey under the bus and I saw you carve your initials into my boyfriend. I'm sure you're open enough to understand that I get turned on only by garbage men. I'm returning your Hannah Montana underwear to you, but I'll keep your mom as a memory. You should also know that I get sick when I think of your feet and I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon.
Go milk a cow,
Ryan
Edited by IdlingSnow, Mar 17 2009, 09:59 AM.
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+ Dragonfire
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To be normal is to be perfect. To be perfect is to be inhuman.

Dear Jackie
I don't really know how to tell you this, but I'm in love with your cat. I think I realized it when we skinny dipped in the bathtub in your apartment and I saw you sit on my knee caps. I'm sure you're Scarred enough to understand that I get turned on only by garbage men. I'm returning your car to you, but I'll keep your photo with the mustache drawn on it as a memory. You should also know that I told in my confession today about the moose poaching and I'm scratching my butt as you read this.
Go drown yourself,
Cameron
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shadow_rukario
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Thou shalt perish before his wrath

Dear Staci,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but I dislike your eyelashes. I think I realized it When I saw the purple monkey outside of your office and I saw you sit on my salt-beef bucket. I'm sure you're open enough to understand that your driving sucks. I'm returning your car to you, but I'll keep your collection of butterflies as a memory. You should also know that I always wanted to break your legs and I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon.
Go milk a cow,
Stephen

I wonder how many times I would get slapped if I showed her this.
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Oldmanerac
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Old Fart

Dear TMM
I don't really know how to tell you this, but Purple hedgehogs want to destroy you. I think I realized it When we skinny dipped in the bathtub At the mental hospital and I saw you Sit on My father. I'm sure you're Frostbitten enough to understand The middle-east is planning their revenge on you. I'm returning Your Hannah Montana underwear to you, but I'll keep Your left ear as a memory. You should also know that I Haven’t showered in a month and I'm scratching my butt as you read this.
Greetings to your frog Leonard
Joshua
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"These kids today with their collector numbers and their newfangled tap symbol. Twenty Black Lotuses and twenty Plague Rats. Now that's real Magic."
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Reno
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Hei.

Dear Laura,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but Our socks don't match. I think I realized it When you smacked my ass at the mental hospital and I saw you Sit on my salt beef bucket. I'm sure you're open enough to understand that I only get turned on by middle aged garbagement. I'm returning Your hannah montannah underwear to you to you, but I'll keep Your glass eye as a memory. You should also know that I Always will remember the pep talks and I have a passionate interest in mice.
Go milk a cow,
Marc
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Trainer X
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One Matzah Short of a Royal Flush

Dear General McHugen,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but your puppy is on fire. I think I realized it I went to bathe the sofa and I saw you laminating the koala. I'm sure you're British enough to understand my facial hair. I'm returning Lakisha to you, but I'll keep your left big toe as a memory. You should also know that I am actually a dolphin and that I enjoy burritos.
Cordially,
Mrs. Man

Oh wait, you're supposed to use that key to fill out... I'll be back later with my real letter...
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Apple Juice
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d-trix in the BUILDING ;;
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Dear A&I,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but our socks don't match. I think I realized it when you smacked my ass outside your office and I saw you carve your initals into my father. I'm sure you're high enough to understand how awful you are. I'm returning your false teeth to you, but I'll keep my common sense as a memory. You should also know that I haven't showered in a month and I'm off to lead a new life as a lemon.
Greetings to your frog Leonard,
Phoenix
It be a spoiler!

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NinjaElephant277
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Master of shadows...and peanuts.
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Dear Katelyn,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but our romance is over. I think I realized it when you smacked my ass in your closet and I saw you carve your initials into my father. I'm sure you're open enough to understand that I may pee my pants. I'm returning the couch cushions to you, but I'll keep your collection of butterflies as a memory. You should also know that I am better off without you and you ruined my attempts at another world war.

Your everlasting enemy,

Klyde
If you have a rhinolt you are willing to trade, please look through my pokes and PM me about a trade.

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:plattail: [16] :felare: [12] :ontlam: [10] "Cream"
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thedude27
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Right In Two
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Dear Fatt,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but purple hedgehogs want to destroy you. I think I realized it when we skinny dipped in the bathtub in your apartment and I saw you sit on the Catholic Priest. I'm sure you're scarred enough to understand that I get turned on only by garbage men. I'm returning the couch cushions to you, but I'll keep your photo with the moustache drawn on it as a memory. You should also know that I never will forget that night and I have a passionate interest for mice.
Please don’t hurt me,
dood
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"Today, a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed into a slow vibration. That we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there's no such thing as death, life is just a dream and we're the imagination of ourselves. Here's Tom with the weather."

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DennR2
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I'm the spark that makes your idea bright
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Dear Amy,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but I'm in love with your cat. I think I realized it when I finally changed my underwear at the mental hospital and I saw you hit on my illegitimate child in Ghana. I'm sure you're open enough to understand that you need a sex-change.
I'm returning the couch cushions to you, but I'll keep your photo with the moustache drawn on it as a memory. You should also know that I told in my confession today about the moose poaching and I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo.

Go milk a cow,
Camden
Edited by DennR2, Apr 1 2009, 09:54 PM.
[37] :wallaro: (Charcoal) :ion: [17]
[32] :gorphibius: (Miracle Seed) :artiox: (Nevermeltice) [30]
[28] :dunviathan: (Pacifi Water) :setista: (Exp.Share) [24]

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Hey Lol
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Youngster
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Dear Adam,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but Our romance is over. I think I realized it When we skinny dipped in the bathtub At the mental hospital and I saw you Carve your initials into My salt-beef bucket. I'm sure you're Cowardly enough to understand How awful you are. I'm returning Your car to you, but I'll keep The results of that blood-sample as a memory. You should also know that I Love your sweet, sweet ass and I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo.
Love always,

jon
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